I have not written for a while and now it is strange to write to publish. I went back to my notebook - the writing of the morning - which I started in June 1st. it says "I make art because it calms me down." I do not remember writing it. it is approaching the last page. It is fun to go back to find what I was trying to say. I am realizing that the year is almost over. it is actually 3/4 of the year that is gone but it has the different sense of time from the first quarter of the year to the last quarter of the year waiting to end. I do not have the exact plan for the next year yet. Now I try to remember why I wanted to start this blog. when I am writing I would imagine I was speaking to my future self, to a 90 year-old version of me, trying to explain how I am experiencing this time. I have many moments in my life that I wish I had recorded.

Although I set this out as a year to play and I think I have been pretty successfully at it, on planning for the next year I will have to figure out how I will sustain in. The finance. and think about what I am doing out of a habit and what I am afraid of doing just because it's new to me. Generally speaking I think I'm in NY for too long. This has become the world I know..